dj-nasir got the whole club complaining about his selection of metal
frog discord server
might rain tonight
awesome
just saw a fly
i love flys
just hopped
ok
just peed on someones hand
ok
Stuck in a timeloop but I’m so afraid of being owned by someone’s epic prank I just keep acting like I haven’t noticed
“I really like going to work today and doing my job. My work today was so enjoyable I wouldn’t even be rustled if I had to do it again tomorrow hypothetically.”
“That bus exploding was really shocking and new to me. I didn’t intervene due to the fact that I was just so surprised about it, and not because I’m butthurt over past attempts to save it which have taught me about the unerring yolk which so stubbornly ties fate to its chosen tragedy.”
“I’m literally not even reeeing about this traffic jam caused by the bus explosion. I like it here. If I finally get home 2.5 hours late tonight to find my wife crying alone over a cold dinner while she tells me she’s been having an affair with the dentist, I wouldn’t even mald. It’s literally my favorite dinner she’s making so I wouldn’t care if I were to experience this between 1 and an indefinite number of times.”
I thought this had the vibe of a 90s/00s email forward, which means it has the vibe of a mid-00s Myspace warning, which means it has the vibe of a bit of 80s faxlore, which means it has the vibe of a stern warning in a manners/advice column before that, etc., and sure enough looking it up this warning did hit the internet as a early 00s email forward and has spread in a long unbroken chain until it hit TikTok lol
Will they never catch this dastardly perfume kidnapper…when will his consistent rate of zero kidnappings a year be enough…
so how the fuck are they staying awake then?
#a stranger in a full biohazard suit asked me to smell him and next thing i know i’m down a kidney
My fave part of this urban legend isn’t just that it’s ancient but that the early versions at least contained some explanation for why the kidnapper wasn’t passing out (the drugged perfume was in a bottle) but now it’s just. Watch out for the kidnapper who has drugged perfume that’ll knock you out if you sniff it once, but not if you smell it all day and have it on your skin and clothes
Just like the Halloween candy urban legend, there is a real case here: a woman in Alabama who claimed that in 1999 she was drugged with cologne, and that not only was she robbed, but her employer lost money to. But her story was never proven: nobody ever identified a substance that could do that, her toxicology report came back negative, and her story contained weird bits of illogic like how she was robbed entering a bank. There’s speculation she made up the story as cover for pocketing her employer’s money herself but nothing was ever proven either way
I can’t find out, though, whether the urban legend was inspired by her case or if she was using the urban legend as cover, like in the poisoned Halloween candy case.
am i currently ensconced in a ballgown, a delicately gilded and long knife strapped to my thigh, the candlelight catching the my eyes across a dinner table as the castle lady’s heart flutters inexplicably, her mind suddenly wandering to beds and gloves and long teeth? no? then no, this email does not find me well, thank u for asking
my buddy (computer scientist) says they are making a computer that will die a natural death surrounded by loved ones . with a really good graphics card